People who gaslight others want, fundamentally, one thing. Control. They might be calculated manipulators, they might think gaslighting is the only way to preserve (their idea of) a healthy relationship, they might not even know that they’re gaslighting you.
But, in every case, they are driven by fear and the desire to control.
Are you under someone else’s control? If you trust them more than your own eyes — then yes, you’ve surrendered your autonomy.
In close relationships, where all kinds of behaviors exist under the labels of “love” and “care”, it can be difficult to figure out if you’re dealing with miscommunication or emotional abuse.
But it’s possible.
There are several innocent-looking but insidious phrases that are a part of every gaslighter’s repertoire. If you’re hearing them from someone with regularity, in this person’s eyes you’re a marionette.